Affordability

Written April 1, 2021

Affordability

It takes a decision, informed or not, to align with the cost or to align with the opportunity. No matter what you choose (not choosing is still a choice), there is a scale balanced between safety and risk in operation. Often people decide or decide by not choosing via justification, you see what you desire to see.

My Dad said to me as a middle-school teen, “In life, you will hear people say they can or they can’t afford things. It comes down to what things in your life you are choosing to make a priority.”

It is one of those sentences that has evolved in its meaning and continues to grow in relevance as I age.

The risk/safety assessment scale can be applied to each aspect of wellness...sleep, nutrition, love, time, and money, to name a few.

What can you afford?

Of course, it is typically used in the context of money, the word affordability. There is a taboo aura present when people say they can’t afford something. It shuts people up. There is an unexplored vulnerability there, to discuss money. How could one person rightfully tell another what they can or cannot afford? It begins in a person’s constitution, what they value and what they believe the outcome of their decisions might manifest. Transparency is minimized and much is assumed from outward appearances. Applying the same process across cultural and societal assumptions in the other realms of health raises questions.

Can you afford to grab that quick sweat session after a long day at the office? Can you afford to eat that second piece of raspberry cheesecake? Can you afford that new pair of shoes? Can you afford to ignore the news your doctor just informed you of? Can you afford to tell your wife you met another woman who makes you feel again? Can you afford spending all night to finish updating your website? Can you afford the college your senior just got accepted into after years of sacrifice and hard work? Can you afford the new car? Can you afford to selfishly be obsessed with a new lover? Can you afford to sit at sunset on the dock? Can you not?

What it comes down to, when you break down all the judgements and justifications, is what you hold as value to the essence of who you are.

I value experiences, connection (to others and nature), emotional health, friendships, adventure, and family. When affordability comes into question these make the rise to the top of the triage list, quickly. Think of a Labrador when it sees water, it’s instinctive. Obstacles aren’t seen as stops, merely solutions in their discovery.

As much as security, certainty, planning and reasonable sound nice, they just do not surface in the same way until necessity puts it front and center and my core values and my essence are threatened.

With each decision we make, their is a cost and an opportunity. Those in the financial world are great at explaining this to their audience. Those in health and wellness are not so skilled as it is often delivered with immense judgment and loads of shame and blame. Without holding one’s vulnerabilities (many unexplored) with compassion and empathy, many in healthcare have already decided for you what you value and why. It is not a productive solution for long term outcomes for a fulfilled life. It is unfortunate most optimize for short term metrics.

When a decision aligns with your values, when it strikes the essence of who you are, the scale doesn’t exist. Justification occurs when clarity needs a friend. No friends are necessary when you are looking in the mirror at who you are. What do you value? Many answer what they value through many lenses...their family of origin values, what their spouse values, what their culture and society values. I invite you to go sit and ask deeply what do you value?

Regret will keep you anchored to each decision made and the risk endured. It creates hesitation toward your future. Perhaps not the interest you committed to pay?

Let go.

Gratefulness acknowledges the alignment, seen when looking back. Look up.

Appreciation values the information gathered from the decision, awareness of the cost but alignment with the opportunity. It is held in the moment.

Lean in.

There is an opportunity and there is a cost.

If you had certainty, would the risk exist?

If there was a guarantee you could get your money back, would you invest the time?

Are you looking to support your desire to remain stuck?

(Then you will find that support.)

Are you looking to support your desire to move toward what you want?

(Then you will find that support.)

At Between Diabetes we aim to help people discover how to see in the darkness, the moments doubt, shame, and challenge tell you what you want is out of reach and who you are and what you value is threatened. We offer grace and integrity as platforms for change. We don’t change who you are, we change how you see.

Each of us have a unique offering to this world, a contribution to connect each other and experiences to hold. We support you to inspire yourself.

Between Diabetes, the name, it was felt before it was explained.

In the alchemy of life, the dissolution and the build, a constant process like waves in the ocean, who we are, our essence, what makes us open our eyes in the morning and savor the end of the dream and the entry to our day, a destination is desired but in the space between the desire and the manifestation, the journey, that is life.

The tightrope is constant. Stagnation often means death, even if you remain breathing.

Diabetes is my circumstance, my condition, my situation that gave me contrast in my life.

It gave me challenge.

It has taught me how to love more fully than anything I could have imagined.

It reminded me to show the world nobody is broken and we all need to be held.

Most importantly, in that contrast, diabetes illuminated my path, my priorities, my definitions and my desires as mine, nobody else’s, mine.

It is the space between, between me and my circumstances, my conditions and my situations, the space of utter unknowing, uncertainty, the step into the void, the terror coupled with the exhilaration...am I going up or am I going down and the faith that no matter what occurs, I remain. Who I am is between diabetes, between my circumstances, between my conditions and between my situations.

I serve high performing individuals seeking support and guidance in their health and wellness. Together we allow their magic to surface, BETWEEN their situation, condition and circumstance.

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#health #yourlife #loveyourlife #wellness #wellbeing #healthandwellness #wellnesscoach #mindsetcoach #perspective #life #mindset #growth #growthmindset #choices

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