Serenity & Trust
2012
Twenty two years of living with diabetes. She invited me in January at the Outdoor Retailer Show in Salt Lake City. My good friend, Krissy Moehl, the race director for the Chuckanut 50K. I hadn't been training much and the race was 6 weeks away. I quickly began to super train, aka ramp up mileage and time on my feet, and pray for no injuries to surface.
My truths.
I did not know the course.
I did not have support people on the course.
I wasn't aware of the exit capabilities.
For me, as a diabetic athlete, this represented the first race I would do without support specific to me and my diabetes along the course or a friend running with me during the race. Up to this ultra, most of my races were at local events in Santa Barbara. Writing about it several years later, I can read how silly that might sound with all the experiences I had gathered up to that moment.
My training went well. I arrived in Bellingham, WA, the evening before and had a chance to visit for a short while with Krissy and other locals involved in the race. It snowed the night before and the morning of the race. The weather forecast did not indicate this would occur. We woke up and located garbage bags to drape over our bodies before the start.
It was magical, the scenery. There was a moment before mile 10, as I passed this small lake, a pond really, serenity consumed me. The nature around me was full of contrast. It was a different perspective, red earth next to lush green vegetation, both draped with a fresh snow coat, next to the water. I paused to take a photo of the lake; it is above. The miles continued to click by. 10, 13, 16, 18, 24, 25, 26, 27, 29, 30... As I finished the race that day, I felt more than just another big chunk of miles checked as done. It wasn't about the event; it was about my relationship with myself. Reoccurring, intimate, positive, low-risk interactions are the essentials in building trust in a relationship. That was what I felt after completing the 2011 Chuckanut 50K, a state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled with a firm belief internally in the reliability, truth, ability, and strength of me. Doors of opportunity for living with diabetes opened that day, a solid win.